"Jason, what's my silly name?"

"I don't know." [laughs]

"Is it Daddy Waddy?"

"No! Not today!"

"Not today?"

"No, that's yesterday!"

"So what's my silly name today?"

"I don't know. Ummm... Radio!"

"Daddy Radio?"

"Yeah!" [laughs]

"Oh my goodness, how silly."

"And Cooper is... ummmmm... [looks around] House!"

"Cooper House?"

"Yeah! [laughs] And Jason is... ummmm... [looks around] Bird!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah! [laughs] Jason Birdy! Not Turkey today, Bird! And Mommy is Mommy Gobble Gobble! [laughs]"

This is Jason's current favorite game. He loves it so much that it's nearly guaranteed to pull him out of a tantrum or distract him from something else he wants. The best part is how he can so thoroughly crack himself up just by looking around and picking at random something that he can see.

"They got married."

"Yeah."

"You got married, too."

"I got married?"

"Yeah, to Mommy."

"That's right, I got married to Mommy."

"Not today."

"No, it was a long time ago. See that picture over there? Of me and Mommy looking at each other?"

"Yeah."

"That's when we got married. See? Mommy is wearing a white dress and Daddy is wearing a tuxedo."

"Oh... I'm going to get married, too. When I get big."

"Oh yeah? You're going to find yourself a nice girl and get married?"

"Yeah, just like you."

"Jason, did you use the toilet at school today?"

"Yeah!"

"You did? That's very good!"

"I just went pee pee, not poo poo."

"Still, that's very good, Jason, I am very proud of you."

"Yeah."

"And you went poo poo on the toilet just now, too."

"Yeah."

"That's so good Jason. It makes Daddy so happy when you use the toilet like a big boy."

"I'm a human being Mickey Mouse!"

"...OK."

"I was just thinking about that bed of his and I realized that it's the same size as that bed you had in high school, that we slept together in. Which is just crazy."

"Yeah."

"And then I thought, you know what? He might have a girl in that bed some day."

"Whoah."

Me: "Do you like Ms. Manijeh? Is she your friend?" [Ms. Manijeh is one of the teachers at his day care.]

Jason: "Um yeah." [This is his new thing, putting "um" in front of his answers. I don't know what's up with that.]

Me: "That's good. What about Eva, is she your friend?"

Jason: "Um yeah."

Me: "And is Tescia your friend?"

Jason: "Um yeah."

Me: "Is Kayleigh your friend?"

Jason: "Um no."

Me: "No?"

Jason: "Ale my friend."

Me: "Ale's your friend? Well that's nice."

Jason: "And Kayleigh."

Me: "Wait, Kayleigh is your friend?"

Jason: "Everybody my friend, daddy!"

Me: "That's true. Everybody is your friend, Jason."

Jason: "And Jason my friend, and Mommy my friend, and Daddy my friend. And Cooper my friend."

Me: [smiling] "That's right, we are all your friends."

Jason: "I love you!"

Me: "Awww, thank you! I love you too!"

Jason: "I love you, daddy!"

Me: "Awww... That is so sweet. I'm going to kiss you now!"

Jason: "No, don't kiss me!"

"It's nice to be called Mommy, don't you think?"

"Uh..."

"OK, whatever. Har har. Isn't it nice to have someone call you Daddy?"

"Well, yeah, it's nice, but it's also really weird. And in a lot of ways I kind of think it always will be."

"Yeah."

"See that woman over there?"

"Yeah."

"The book she's reading—I've read it. And it was really good."

"Oh."

"Do you ever... No, you probably don't."

"What don't I ever?"

"Um, do you ever see someone reading a book that you really loved and get a little jealous of them that they're getting to read it for the first time and you never will again?"

"No."

"Yeah, see, that's what I thought."

* * *

"Daddy, I missed you!"

"You did? Wow, what a nice thing to say to me, Jason. Thank you."

"I have a poop!"

"Oh. OK, well that's nice, too."

Jason: I have a owie.

Me: I know, but it's almost all better.

Jason: Bite it.

Me: What?

Jason: I bite the owie.

Me: Don't bite it. You're going to hurt yourself.

Jason: Lick it?

Me: Uh, OK, I guess you can lick it if you want.

Jason: [licks the scab on his knee]

Jason: I licked it!

Me: That was an extremely weird thing to do, Jason.

The teachers at Jason's day care have been focusing on getting the kids to learn their full names lately. Jason is a pretty bright kid, but in this he's at a bit of a disadvantage. After all, a five-syllable name is too much for most adults to handle gracefully, and to be saddled with it at the age of two, well, it ain't a cake walk is all I'm saying.

Fortunately, though, Jason loves new words and loves to talk, so he seems to be having fun trying out his last name. Combined with his recent discovery of birthdays and the birthday song, it's made for some pretty cute scenes:

When I picked Jason up from day care this evening, one of his art projects was waiting for me in his folder. We've been getting a lot of these since he moved up to the two-year-old class, and it's nice to see how he spends his time. This time it was a little paper plate that he had painted.

Walking out to the car, Jason, of course, asked to hold it.

"Jason hold that?" he asked.

"You want to hold this?" (I repeat his words back to him a lot, sometimes to make sure I understood him, but sometimes just to make things take longer.)

"Yeah! I made it."

"Oh, yeah, you made it." (See?)

He pointed at it. "Put food. On there."

"No, it's not a plate anymore. It's art now! Are you an artist?"

"No!"

"Oh, OK. Do you think you might be an artist some day? That would be OK with me."

"No!"

"OK, buddy, whatever you want."

A few minutes later, as we were on the way home, Jason was staring intently at the plate.

"It's a moo!"

"It's Shamu?"

"No! It's a moo!"

"The moon?"

"No! A moo! It's a moo!"

"Oh! A moo? It's a cow?"

"Yeah! It's a cow."

"I see."

"Cow swimming. The water!"

"The cow is swimming in the water?"

"Yeah! Shamu lives. In the water!"

"Yeah, Shamu lives in the water."

"With the cow!"

A few more minutes later:

"Don't like it."

"What?"

"Don't like it. The cow."

"Why not? What did the cow do?"

"I don't know."

"OK."

"It's wet."

"It's wet?"

"Yeah. It's wet. The water."

So, apparently, this piece is a wet, swimming cow that lives in the water with Shamu, which Jason doesn't like, executed in paint on paper plate. Would you like to see it?

With an imagination like that, it's too bad he's so set against being an artist.